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5714@lemmy.dbzer0.com to Shitty Ask Lemmy@lemmy.mlEnglish · 26 days ago

Why didn't they AirTag Jesus?

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Why didn't they AirTag Jesus?

5714@lemmy.dbzer0.com to Shitty Ask Lemmy@lemmy.mlEnglish · 26 days ago
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  • swab148@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    26 days ago

    I heard that someone involved wasn’t a fan of Apple

    • 5714@lemmy.dbzer0.comOP
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      26 days ago

      Walled Garden, eh? Shitty HOA I’ve heard

  • lemmygarden@lemmy.today
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    26 days ago

    It is an old school low tech air tag. First you have to kill every non Jewish person in the middle east. Then you have to build a great Jewish temple, preferably on top of a super holy Muslim mosque. Then you need to place some red heifer cows around the temple. About 9 of them. Preferably from Texas. It’s a whole thing. Trust me bro. Once you turn it on, then you find Jesus. Source - American evangelical psychopaths.

  • southsamurai (he/him/pronoun agnostic)@sh.itjust.works
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    26 days ago

    They did, right in the hands

    • 5714@lemmy.dbzer0.comOP
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      26 days ago

      I used to be an adventurer like you

  • Vegan_Joe@anarchist.nexus
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    26 days ago

    Apparently it’s already easy to find Jesus. Just ask any Evangelical.

    • 5714@lemmy.dbzer0.comOP
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      26 days ago

      They haven’t been too helpful after I pressed them for information about Adamgelicals

    • Valarie@lemmygrad.ml
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      26 days ago

      they keep telling me but every time i try and walk into one of their churches i catch on fire so i can only assume jesus dosent want me to find him

    • starweasel [it/its, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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      26 days ago

      i mean, clearly it isnt that easy cuz they keep asking for help " hey have you found jesus" “would you like to hear about jesus” like cmon just put up a missing persons poster already.

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