Try listening to it sped up a bit, like 1.25 speed. Definitely helps with the lip-licking or whatever he’s doing.

It also makes Elliott sound even higher-pitched but I never have trouble following what he’s saying.

Chelsea has a red card in them today. Probably Reece or Sterling get a second booking but I can also see Enzo with a straight red.

I’m pretty sure one of his teenage mates already dared him to shave off his eyebrows with a rusty blade.

It’s like this every week. They’ll get a few breakthroughs on the other end though, and are usually pretty clinical.

But Overall they’re way too open to mount a serious challenge for the league.

So what does ‘regulatory action’ really mean? Fines are one thing. Hitting the club itself with competitive-based sanctions, because they spoke their opinion, that sounds illegal as hell.

Ok I’m remembering someone else. Thought he was around £20mil which was a massive amount for Wenger back then.

Am I correct in remembering he was our record transfer at the time?

Love it when some old Brit like Ian Darke mangles another language pronunciation. Calling Qatar “CAT-ur” or Chile “chilly”.

If you really want to humble yourself, get out on a public pitch and try to recreate that Zinchenko goal. If you can just make contact in rhythm without falling or injuring yourself, you’re better than 90% of us. Forget actually punching it under the crossbar.

BAHAHAHA I’ve been upstairs for 20 minutes fixing my kid’s stupid iPad. Just walked down and saw the Spurs score.

Yeah let’s all just appreciate the fact that Dec is 24 and already generating valid comps to Patrick MF Vieira.

Rice will go down as one of the great CMs in PL history, I have no doubts.

United fans want to axe Paul Tierney of all people. And they have good reason. PGMOL is in for a complete overhaul. You can’t rile up the London clubs AND Liverpool AND Man United and hope to survive, no matter how much money the UAE is feeding you.

Madders looked pretty annoyed after Bissouma skied the free kick. In his defense whose idea was that?

They had a lot of those penalty area touches in the first 15. I think it was 12-2 around then, so we led 15-12 after.