And it makes the whole ordeal just… so hard.

I’m not the first to be anxious about it, and I won’t be the last, but that doesn’t make it any easier.

I want to tell my family. I want to tell the people who can support me, because without that support I fear my transition won’t be going anywhere for quite some time. And that’s a thought I don’t want to have right now.

Getting it out would also help tremendously with my day to day life in general. That weight on my chest is so heavy right now, it genuinely cancels out my ADHD meds most days, which doesn’t make my life any simpler either.

There’s always this worry about how they will react. Parents, siblings and so on. I don’t think my family would have anything against it, so it shouldn’t be that hard, right?

My sisters react positively to any little hint I drop, and answer all my questions that go outside of traditional masculinity without any judgement at all. Giving me an epilator they had left over was the most normal thing in the world to them, and I can’t appreciate it enough.

My parents, well idk. They don’t really know much about LGBTQIA+ in general, though the concept of being trans is not foreign to them. My mum has mentioned on multiple occasions in my life as a single that she wouldn’t mind if I brought a guy home, instead of a girl. So that’s a start, I guess.

There is one guy in my family who is very conservative. I don’t think he’d like it, but I’ve always stood my ground on literally anything we ever talked about, and I very much mean to continue doing so.

So, before this turns into a novel, I will stop myself there. Damn phone screens being so small, I’m never aware of how much I already wrote.

I think I’ll approach the topic with my sisters first, sounds like a good plan.

Only need the courage to do so.