The best success I had on a personal level was actually understanding and learning what the internet culture was like for young people and engaging with the children in my family on their level about the actual shit they were seeing, even friending them on their social media in case they ever wanted help.

Having casual and funny conversations about “the Redpill” and incels with my teenage nieces was massively helpful as the trend was rising, talking about the things they would encounter online and the things people say, and why they say it. Their parents had no idea what was going on with their internet lives, but I made a real effort to always be there and listen to their stories and give actual, actionable advice that wasn’t “Oh sweetie, the internet isn’t real, just turn it off when people act like that” like so many gen-X/millenial parents did, which made kids feel ashamed to talk about their emotional reactions to things they read and see online.

Of course they had problems with internet freaks, like all girls online, but they talked openly about it, they felt better about talking to an adult who understands the culture, and developed into very healthy adults with social lives (and tasers and pepper spray, each of 'em) but I really don’t know how to spread this as a “program” when so many parents lose track of youth culture because they’re too busy earning food and utility bills.

I love he was inventive enough to design a tank a couple centuries before anyone actually built one, but couldn’t piece together a better idea for aiming in any direction than “cannons pointed in every conceivable direction.”

I absolutely agree, we used to have movie theaters and arcades and skate parks and various kinds of stores that people would hang out at just because going out and shopping was what people did, so shopping areas were developed to make them more attractive.

With the advent of online shopping, places like malls died rapidly and with them also died outdoor activities and people just hanging out around other people in crowds, there was an energy to life that disappeared with malls and so many storefronts. There are still a few malls and pleasant shopping areas here and there, but they’re not places you want to spend time at, they’re more like showrooms for Amazon.

I don’t know if there’s a good answer for that though, I don’t know if you just started building things like arcades and youth bookstores and the like if you would actually get anyone going out to use them, because that original incentive is gone, the whole “going out and seeing what’s new” thing has disappeared, because again… we get all that from our algorithmic feeds.

What would make YOU excited to go out and hang out around other people? I feel that the entire premise is dying, and adults are equally crippled by this problem as kids, which is why I keep saying this isn’t just a “kids and social media” problem, this is all of us and our relationship with the internet.

any female born after 1983 can’t cook… all they know is leaf litter, curl they shells up, scuttling, lay eggs, eat rotten plant matter and lie

They look exactly like the kinds of people who would birth someone into a lifestyle of horrific social attitudes and a doctrine of aesthetics and appearances over substance.

They also look like they are literally struggling to keep the human flesh on their twisted, hellspawned bodies.

Racism AND capitalism.

The “single family home” was barely a concept before American development early last century. For the majority of human history, people dwelled together, raised families together, stayed together and supported each other their whole lives.

It was the housing industry making these “neighborhoods of the future” that started pushing the idea of moving out at 18 and getting a home on your steel-mill salary of $10 per week, and then it became shameful to still live with your family past a certain age. Forcing so many Americans into a role of being a sole-provider for an entire household as wages have dropped and house prices have soared, and we all still keep “investing” into homes in suburbia despite nobody feeling fulfilled in these cul-de-sac lives, and both parents of children having to work 6 days a week or more just to afford to sleep there.

Oddly enough, I have a strong feeling this will get marginally more support and a warmer reception than injectable vaccines.

Source: I’ve argued with dozens of people about vaccines in real life, and 90% of them were JUST scared of needles and injections and just built giant palaces of rationalization that consumed their whole lives to validate that fear. You know who doesn’t give a shit about vaccines even if they’re conservative? Diabetics who have to inject insulin every day.

349 million frogs in a pot that’s slowly getting hotter and hotter.

Look, it’s just a consequence of making comedy legal again, don’t you want comedy legal?

I guess to elaborate on that point I will say that it’s not a specific platform problem, meaning all the naive Lemmykids here saying “move to fediverse and you won’t have problems anymore” are just playing shell-game with the problem, it’s going to be inherent to ANY platform that publishes content as long as there’s commercial incentive to grab people’s attention.

I don’t think it’s unreasonable to say in response “you’re clearly not enjoying this so just stop doing it”

You need to learn about addiction I think, you can ask anyone with an addiction if they enjoy their drug, and they will universally say no, they hate it, they wish they could have it out of their life, but their brains are holding them there. This is the “disease” part of addiction and why you can’t just tell someone to “stop doing the thing that’s hurting you” and that expectation that you can do that is harmful. We have studied and researched this in great detail.

This isn’t even an issue with seeing bad things on your feed, this is an issue with there being a “feed” at all, and your own connection to that feed and what you’re getting out of it, what it’s replacing in your life. You, your parents, your kids, everyone is hitting off this drug and everyone is addicted and hating it. It’s literally an addictive drug but we’re not treating it like one because it goes directly to the brain instead of using a chemical go-between to do the exact same thing as a drug. So whole families are doing this drug night and day and not pulling each other out because it’s not being recognized as a drug with dangers.

I am not sure you really know what you’re arguing, as evident by the continued tangents to imagined conversations so I’ll end it here, take some time to think about what it is exactly you’re making a case for or against.

What if we stopped making it profitable to be a hateful guy on the internet by removing the monetization of drama and rage and stopped making contention a career?

You seem to be reacting contentiously here, maybe you’re thinking I’m defending this social trend, I’m just pointing out that if you think banning, restricting or taking away social media from youth is an answer, you’re ignoring the massive wall of incentive pushed on people by capital forces to use the largest, most commercially active platforms, and we would have a long way to go socially before this isn’t the most attractive option for adults and children alike.

We have to address this issue with adults and kids alike drawn into this magic realm of dopamine scrolling and marketing. If you just say “stop using this thing you like” without an actual motivation behind it or a way to address the addictive nature of it, you won’t have any more success than if you put a pack of cigarettes on the kitchen counter of a smoker and say “Don’t you smoke these! It’s bad for you!” why are you setting yourself up for disappointment and anger at others?

Like, fucking duh, people know what’s bad for them while continuing to engage in bad behavior, if you can do it fine, great, we’re not talking about how easy it is for you personally to quit bad habits, we’re talking about a larger issue and have to treat populations like populations, not apply your own standard onto millions of people and expect them to handle any of this the same way. This is a social problem, not a moral failing, the moralizing of things that hurt us has been a scourge on actual helping with issues like eating, addiction, sex and literally everything else we try to overcome as a species.

“But but Lemmy is social media and you participate here. Curious.”

I can’t really follow what your imagined argument is about but it’s kind of annoying and giving self-fart-huffing energy.

Do not look at the mess and think about how much work it will take to clear it all out, that’s just going to overwhelm you and make you frustrated, so focus on your living space, wherever you sleep. Do some massive cleanout of your immediate area. Then the kitchen and bathroom(s) that you use specifically. Focus on yourself first.

As they say, always put on your own oxygen mask before helping anyone with theirs.

That’s it, just focus on having a clean room and hygienic bathroom and food-prep areas, make it so you can easily wipe counters and wash dishes that you use. You will face constant setbacks and every time you clear a countertop, there will be a new sack of clutter and bullshit placed there the next day. Learn to manage your frustrations and keep to the plan while you work on getting your own life together enough that you can move out and get therapy. You will need therapy.

If having a couple small clean areas inspires your family to do more, great. Just don’t expect it. Hoarding is a mental health problem that needs serious treatment and some level of self-awareness by the hoarder that they have a problem, so don’t expect to fix it, just try to carve yourself a path out.

many are too worried about their potential moderate republican voters corporate donors, the same donors who donate to republicans.

FTFY

Don’t use Instagram or TikTok

This isn’t realistic to tell a kid who uses social media, it’s like saying “Don’t play Xbox” or “Don’t watch new releases, only watch stuff that’s out on video already”

This isn’t a specific platform problem, it’s a social problem and needs social solutions. The solution we need the most involves a lot of tranquilizer darts and reeducation camps for about 28% of society broadly. That’s probably not going to be realistic, so the second best approach is the one that people are most adverse to trying, which is more active and involved parenting and reducing screen-time as a whole family.

I’m burning out seeing all this “social media on children” talk when it’s the adults’ relationship to social media that is causing the most widespread harm.

holy shit these comments

Lemmy is no better than reddit and other large platforms broadly when it comes to being an insular community of tech-focused young guys with horrific sexual insecurity.

Despite the wallpaper that it’s supposed to be further left than other sites, just about every online community is going to have a large share of “incel adjacent” shut-ins, as they are the segment most likely to keep a forum or website active. I’ve seen all the same rotten sentiments across Lemmy about women as I’ve seen deep in the trenches of the gender-wars during gamergate, it’s just usually softened with some disclaimer.

Young people use social media to communicate with each other, their peers and friends and community.

You’re not getting high school kids to move to a backwater, low-traffic, unexciting platform to scroll a handful of forums of neurodivergent guys talking about linux.

This isn’t a technological problem as much as a sociological. It is a problem between people and needs to be solved between people.

That’s the point of the comment, and why there are “=” signs preceding the translation of what the term actually means for many people.