I want to wear cute outfits on the trolley

Broke: refunding the commission

Woke: throwing in a freebie for mom

The first two times it was funny because bigots are just that pathetic. The third time felt awful because there’s an innocent child being raised by someone with heart full of hate. Hopefully that kid turns out okay and finds a good therapist to help unpack what a piece of work their father is.

That can’t be him in the photo. I saw him rescuing a kitten out of a tree on the other side of the country that day, said he was on his way to volunteer at a homeless shelter.

I think this is the episode where they get a pool in the back of a truck, can’t remember the name.

This happens before the pool. Bart and Lisa are complaining about the heat, the ice cream man drives by saying “ICE CREAM! ICE CREAM!” They look up excitedly before he adds “WE’RE ALL OUTTA ICE CREAM!” Soon after this truck comes by and the driver is saying “Chili! Boiling hot, Texas style chili!” I quote this guy literally any time I make chili.

Ant(i)-meme

Minority report

You freak out at first but then he uses the ol’ fetus deletus spell

The thing about a jimmy, it’s got lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll’s eyes. When it comes at you it doesn’t seem to be livin’… until he bites you, and those black eyes roll over white.

When they decided “protect the kids” was a good enough excuse to ramp up the surveillance state.

The monsterfuckers all clicked that link

I wish I were Demyx so I could be mercilessly bullied by Larxene

Don’t you mean “it’s ÞE crackdown”

Facebook does look like ass

If the juiced numbers are this bad, the real numbers must be absolute dogshit.

For anyone wondering, she’s a conservative influencer who worked with BlazeTV, Toilet Paper USA, contributed opinion pieces to RT and, unsurprisingly, has ties to the Russian government.

Groovy 🦾

If there was a button where I have a 99% chance to win a million dollars, but a 1% chance to turn into a girl with a chainsaw arm, I’d press it. Probably for less. Maybe even $20 dollars.

Still cischainsaw tho.

Carbon Monoxide detectors are even worse. They just contently beep and give me a headache, had to toss 'em all out.

Right up there with Google’s “Don’t be Evil”