And it makes the whole ordeal just… so hard.

I’m not the first to be anxious about it, and I won’t be the last, but that doesn’t make it any easier.

I want to tell my family. I want to tell the people who can support me, because without that support I fear my transition won’t be going anywhere for quite some time. And that’s a thought I don’t want to have right now.

Getting it out would also help tremendously with my day to day life in general. That weight on my chest is so heavy right now, it genuinely cancels out my ADHD meds most days, which doesn’t make my life any simpler either.

There’s always this worry about how they will react. Parents, siblings and so on. I don’t think my family would have anything against it, so it shouldn’t be that hard, right?

My sisters react positively to any little hint I drop, and answer all my questions that go outside of traditional masculinity without any judgement at all. Giving me an epilator they had left over was the most normal thing in the world to them, and I can’t appreciate it enough.

My parents, well idk. They don’t really know much about LGBTQIA+ in general, though the concept of being trans is not foreign to them. My mum has mentioned on multiple occasions in my life as a single that she wouldn’t mind if I brought a guy home, instead of a girl. So that’s a start, I guess.

There is one guy in my family who is very conservative. I don’t think he’d like it, but I’ve always stood my ground on literally anything we ever talked about, and I very much mean to continue doing so.

So, before this turns into a novel, I will stop myself there. Damn phone screens being so small, I’m never aware of how much I already wrote.

I think I’ll approach the topic with my sisters first, sounds like a good plan.

Only need the courage to do so.

  • EsheLynn@lemmy.blahaj.zone
    16·
    1 year ago

    My son came out to me a little at a time. Testing the water saying they are lesbian, before they came out as trans. He came out to me in a letter, and was also scared of rejection.

    I knew the statistics, that LGBTQ+ kids have a higher rate of self-harm, depression, and suicide. Knowing nothing at the time, I accepted him on the spot, every time. There was a small pushback from the wife, but I pulled her to the side in private, laid it out, and said he needs our support, regardless of weather we understand anything.

    Your parents sound like they are good people, and your mom is letting you know she is at least okay if you were gay.

    Don’t take this as word of God, but it sounds to me that she may not initially understand you, but she will try. It’s how I was, and now my kids father is their mother lol!

    As a parent, watching my kids grow, and seeing their struggles with coming out and anxiety, seeing how MY family has treated them, and me, I can only grasp at how you are feeling now. I know it’s gotta be tough.

    I wish you the best of luck, whatever you decide.

      • EsheLynn@lemmy.blahaj.zone
        6·
        1 year ago

        I feel you. My mom is like “why do you want to have to worry about bigots?” And I’m like “You can’t un-eat from the Tree of Knowledge, mom!”

        Ignorant people make it seem like a choice. The only choice we are making is to express the deepest parts of ourselves, to take off the mask that was foisted upon us.

        You should probably bring up the fact those kids are suicidal is because they don’t have a proper support network, like loving, accepting parents, and then look at them pointedly. And then follow up with “but I have a loving support group that wants me to be happy, so you don’t have to worry about me being a statistic.”