I hurt. I hurt all the the fucking time. My belly hurts. I’m reducing my drinking but it really sucks. The withdrawals suck real bad.

Lost my colon to U.C. Have a bag on my belly.

I have to move my family out of the south. I have to be physically able to do it. We have to get out.

If I get them out maybe I they’ll be able to live happy.

I just want to die. I want the pain to stop. I don’t let my people know. They can’t do it without me.

I’m tired. I hurt all the time. I’m tired of hurting. I could turn it off, but I don’t for now. I’m tired of the pain. I love them and they need me. I just want to make sure they’re in a good place, away from here. Then I can finish it.

  • haulyard@lemmy.worldEnglish
    8·
    1 year ago

    I don’t know you, but I’m thinking of you. I’m rooting for you. I believe in you. You’re going through some serious shit that I can’t even begin to imagine dealing with, and yet you’re thinking of those around you. Tells me everything I need to know about you. Keep on keepin on my friend.

  • SpezCanLigmaBalls@lemmy.worldMEnglish
    2·
    1 year ago

    I’m so sorry to hear this. I had a New Year’s resolution to stop drinking this year because of how much it just made the pain worse. I understand that going through all of this can make it so hard not to drink but it really does help the pain. Glad to hear you’ve been reducing it.

    Have you gone to pain management clinics to get on meds for the pain?

    Also I just want to say that just from this post I can tell that you are a very strong person with the way you are looking out for your family. I’m so sorry you’re going through This and I hope it gets better and you’re able to get out of the south. Peace of mind can really help pain

    • Machinist@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
      2·
      1 year ago

      Don’t have good enough insurance for pain management clinics or professional medical care in general. Do it ourselves with India prescription drugs for stuff we can’t get over the counter. Thank jeebus my girl is a nurse.