I am the definition of a gentle, caring man. People comment about this. I treated my partner with kid gloves because we both thought that was what she needed. Then she expressed a desire for light BDSM after reading some particularly awful erotica turned her on unexpectedly.

Now she does what I demand in bed, submits to my will outside the bedroom when I deem it best for her, and receives regular maintenance. She had never thought I was capable of this. I had never ventured into this territory because she gave no indication that she wanted it.

If you love each other, then a discussion should be beneficial. If he loves you, he will hear you out and express his feelings on the topic. Many of us are gentle because that is what we believe our partners need. Our goal is to meet their needs, and we cannot do that if they do not express them.