My son (10 yo) has a few very strong interests that he talks about pretty much nonstop. We haven’t discouraged any kind of talking because he was quite delayed. However it has come to my attention that his narrow focus on these topics can annoy his peers at school. I don’t want him to feel ashamed about his interests, but I also don’t want him to be ostracized at school. I’d really appreciate any thoughts this group may have on how to handle (or not) this situation. TIA!
I’m not diagnosed as autistic (though I and everyone close to me suspect I am) though I am diagnosed with fairly severe ADHD which leads me to hyperfocus intensely on anything that interests me. It also makes it very difficult to focus at all on things that don’t interest me. I have always had a really hard time fitting in, had more than my fair of ostracization, but as an adult now I’ve realized that what I’ve gained by being true to myself is a fantastic group of friends who appreciate my true self without any changes to make myself seem more ‘normal’.
Children are horrible, spiteful, cruel fuckers and there is kind of no way around that. You are going to have to help your kid weather that storm in a way that doesn’t involve stifling their authenticity. Obviously, teach them the importance of basic manners and how to not make a fool of themselves, but you also need to trust that exposure to the awful bleakness of youth will make them more resilient and capable of handling adult life.
Take all this with a grain of salt. I’m a computer programmer, not a child psychologist.
Love this, thank you!